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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27891484">Promise Me Never Again (Agere Remus)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/DannyisDone/pseuds/DannyisDone'>DannyisDone</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Agere Janus and Remus Human AU [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Sanders Sides (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Abused Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Abusive Parents, Age Regression, Age Regression/De-Aging, Angst, Child Abuse, Child Neglect, Gen, Human AU, Hurt Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Hurt Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Hurt/Comfort, If I didn't tag something please lmk, Kid Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Kid Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Kid Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Kid Deceit | Janus Sanders, Kid Fic, Non-Sexual Age Play, Past Child Abuse, Self-Harm, Swearing, Sympathetic Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Sympathetic Deceit | Janus Sanders, abused Remus Sanders</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-20 11:41:13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>10,575</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27891484</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/DannyisDone/pseuds/DannyisDone</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>This story contains Age Regression and is NOT sexual.</p><p>Logan invites Remus over for the weekend after finding out about his regression, knowing that the man shouldn't be left alone after his breakdown. He offers to watch Remus when/if he were to regress during his stay, but asks that he be open and honest about his limitations. Remus, ever the denialist, is not completely honest about his boundaries, and ends up regressing to a time he would rather forget.</p><p>Chapter 1 is a flashback sequence.</p><p>+++</p><p>Human AU!</p><p>Warnings: Child Abuse, Child Neglect, Punishments, Remus being Remus, Swearing, Remus has a very scary experience while regressed so please be cautious while reading, panic attacks, crying, a bit of self harm, Remus thinks poorly of his own regression so be careful of that, illusions to self harm, controlling foster parents. If I need to add more please let me know!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Anxiety | Virgil Sanders &amp; Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders &amp; Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders &amp; Deceit | Janus Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders &amp; Logic | Logan Sanders</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Agere Janus and Remus Human AU [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2042323</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>110</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Here is another oneshot for the Agere Human AU! It goes into a bit of detail about Remus's backstory, and then jumps right into when Logan and Remus first start their dynamic together. Hopefully one day I will actually write the whole plot of this au, but for now I am more than okay with just typing oneshots for it. </p><p>The following chapters have not been started, so I don't know when I will be able to post them, but I will try not to make the wait long! Please heed the warnings on this though, I do not want anyone getting overwhelmed, hurt, or triggered by this story. </p><p>Also, while I am open to criticism on my other stories, please refrain from saying things like "This is unrealistic!" or try and defend the parents. This story is very personal to me, and a lot of projection takes place, so please understand that. Though I would still love feedback and comments! And as always, if there are any glaring grammar or spelling mistakes, do not hesitate to point them out &lt;3</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Are you FUCKING kidding me?”</p><p>Remus’s head whipped around as he saw his dad standing in the doorway of his bedroom, his eyes suddenly wide. In one hand he held a pair of dull kitchen scissors that he had stolen about a week ago, which he had kept hidden under his bed. In the other hand were a pair of Roman’s newest jeans, holes now in the knees that hadn’t been there when they were bought. Both items fell from his hands as his dad approached, the clear stench of alcohol radiating from the man and threatened to make the boy gag at the potency. Remus was quick to get to his legs and began to run away, knowing what was about to come. But his dad was quicker, grabbing him by the back of his shirt and yanking him down. </p><p>“Do you know how much fucking money I spent on those?” He screamed, and it made Remus’s ears hurt. He felt tears form in his eyes from both the pain of the fall and the fear of his father’s anger. He made to stand up again, to try and get away or find Roman, but his dad suddenly had him by the hair. </p><p>“Do you?” The man screamed in the boy’s face, Remus actually gagging this time as the smell became unbearable. He shook his head no, tears escaping from his eyes as he moved to stand on his tiptoes to lessen the leverage the man had on his head. </p><p>“I-I’m sorry!” Remus cried, wishing beyond hope that Roman on his mom would come into the room. Dad was always nicer when they were around. But it was late at night. Both boys had been tucked into bed hours ago, but Remus could not stop the impulsive thoughts that raged through his brain, telling him he had to cut up Roman’s jeans. He wasn’t even sure why he had wanted to do it, vaguely remembering having a conversation with Roman about them, but the urge had made it impossible to ignore. Even knowing the consequences weren’t enough to deter the boy anymore. He was constantly in trouble, even for things he didn’t do. He was becoming desensitized to the punishments. Which of course was only seen as a challenge by his father as he came up with new ways to try and instill his authority over the boy. </p><p>His dad was leading him into the living room by his hair, forcing Remus to try and keep in step with him or else the pull would become painful once more. The room was quite dingy, consisting of a couch, a coffee table, and a TV that sat on what was supposed to be a nightstand. The TV was playing an adult show that Remus knew his mom liked, and when he looked over at the couch, he could see his mom was sleeping on it, dark circles under her eyes. Remus felt a bit of hope spark in him, wondering if maybe he was just gonna be forced to stay out here with her, but the thought was quickly dashed when his head was suddenly being grabbed and was forcefully being placed in a corner, his nose squished into the walls. </p><p>“Do NOT move from this spot until I tell you, or I’ll put you in the position.” His dad said from behind him. Remus gave a sharp nod, and finally felt his head being let go. At least he was getting off fairly easy, in his mind. He finally was able to ebb his tears, and stayed standing in the corner. </p><p>He could hear his dad shuffling around, getting comfortable on the couch next to his mom. He hadn’t told him how long he would be standing in the corner. Sometimes his dad would forget that he’d even put the boy there, and Remus would be left alone for a while. But Remus didn’t want to think like that, because his dad was right there. Surely he couldn’t be forgotten about if he was right there, watching him. </p><p>Remus waited as patiently as he could, but it was not one one of his better virtues. He couldn’t sit still for long, always needing to move, which was something he couldn’t really do in the corner, but he resigned himself to trying, knowing it would make the punishment shorter. However, as the minutes ticked by, Remus couldn’t help the nervousness that began to bubble up inside him, making him bounce on his feet lightly. He tried focusing on the words coming from the television, anything to distract him from the wave of nerves and searing boredom that was standing in the corner. He was just beginning to build his confidence up enough to steal a peek behind him to see if maybe his dad had forgotten him, but then he heard a grunt from the man that made Remus jump. </p><p>“If you even think about getting out of that corner, I’ll beat your ass and kick you out for the night.” The man grumbled, threats that never should have been directed towards any child, let alone one only eight years old. However, at this point, Remus would almost prefer the beating. At least he could count on those ending quickly. At least he knew that once they were over, he’d be allowed back into his room, or on occasion Roman’s room, if he wasn’t feeling brave enough to sleep alone. The being kicked out was a whole different story. Remus had never had to spend the night outside, but he’d been locked out of the house before. He wasn’t sure he would like it, with it being dark and everything. He was terrified of the dark, and terrified of being locked away from his mom and brother. </p><p>So, he quietly stood. </p><p>It was an hour before Remus had managed to build up the courage once more to look out of the corner. He had managed to fight off his legs hurting by marching in place a bit, though even that was becoming a bit too repetitive for Remus’s need for movement. He looked behind him to see if dad was still there. If he had left and forgotten Remus, it could mean that he could sneak off to his room and get to sleep. He was very tired, having supposed to been in bed hours ago. When he turned around though, to his horror he saw that dad had fallen asleep on the couch. </p><p>Remus immediately felt fear course through him. What was he supposed to do? Was he allowed out of timeout? If he wasn’t, and he snuck out right under his dad’s nose, it would be hell to pay. His eyes darted towards his mother, who was still sound asleep. He felt tears well back in his eyes, praying to God that she would suddenly wake up and notice what had happened. Remus, even at eight, wasn’t sure he believed in God the way his family did, but sometimes he had no one else to turn to. </p><p>Tonight, God seemed to be ignoring his prayers. </p><p>Remus’s fear kept him glued to the corner for another hour. He began hitting his head on the wall, hoping that maybe it would be loud enough to wake up his mom.His legs were starting to hurt, and he just wanted to go to bed. He had school tomorrow, his punishment shouldn’t be lasting this long! He began hitting his head harder, thinking that maybe if he put a bruise there, they wouldn’t send him to school and let him sleep in. Sometimes they did that when he got bruises. Remus almost enjoyed it, it meant that he could stay home while dad was at work and just hang out with mom. Mom was so much fun to be around when dad wasn’t home. </p><p>He heard his mother’s snores start to get quieter, and Remus looked over at her, wondering if maybe she was waking up. He peered at his dad, seeing that he was deep asleep. Maybe Remus could wake his mom and ask her if she could go to bed. She wouldn’t make him stay awake, right?</p><p>Holding his breath, afraid that if he breathed too loudly he might wake up dad, he carefully walked over towards his mom. She was so pretty, but even in sleep she looked so tired. Remus wondered how a mom could look so put together but be so broken. He sighed, before giving her shoulder a small shake. </p><p>“Mommy?” He whispered quietly. “Mommy, can I get out of timeout?” Sometimes his mom would answer questions in her sleep, and Remus always listened, because it was typically what he wanted to hear anyways. She wouldn’t always remember that she said something or gave him permission to do something, but Remus didn’t think that mattered. If she said it, then it was allowed. He watched her for a moment, though she didn’t seem to stir. He tried again, daring to be just a bit louder.</p><p>“Mommy, I’m tired.” He said, tears filling his eyes as the desperation hit him. If his mom wouldn’t wake up and let him out, would he have to stay in the corner all night? Had dad planned this on purpose? He could feel his chest start to tighten. He didn’t want to be in timeout all night. He gave her shoulder another shake, but she didn’t react at all, as if she was more in a coma than sleeping. </p><p>“Mommy, please!” He cried, but it was too loud, and suddenly he heard dad start to shift and stir, making Remus spin around in fear. </p><p>“Do NOT wake your mother, Remus.” His dad said, though he didn’t sit up or even open his eyes. Remus hurried back to the corner quickly, not wanting to face anymore punishment. He hid his face behind his hands to try and muffle the cries that were threatening to overwhelm him. Dad was gonna make him stay here all night, and there was nothing Remus could do. He wept for a while, still partially praying that his tears would somehow wake his mom, that some maternal instinct that she did not have would finally trigger in her and she would pick him up and hide him away. It was getting to the point that he couldn’t even remember why he’d been put in the corner in the first place, did Daddy just hate him that much?</p><p>Hours went by. Remus eventually had to sit down, because his little legs couldn’t hold him up anymore. He laid his head on the wall and watched the television, knowing he would have to fight to stay awake so that if his dad did wake up, he could quickly stand back up and put his nose back in the corner and try to pretend that he had been a good boy all night. But his eyes were so heavy and hurting from crying. </p><p>He hated this. He hated Daddy. He wished that he had never done whatever it was he had done to be put in the corner. He balled his fists up and started hitting his legs, trying to stay awake and trying to get rid of all the anger he felt, because anger got him in trouble. And when he was too exhausted to hit himself anymore, he would cry again, because he didn’t know what else to do. He was alone and scared and sad. He wanted Mommy or Bubby or anyone to come get him. He would even be happy if Daddy would wake up and tell him he could go to bed. As his whimpers grew, he placed his thumb in his mouth and suckled on it, one of the ways that he self soothed. He knew he was too old to suck his thumb, and he often got in trouble for it, but some days he just needed to do it. It wasn’t like he was getting comfort from anything else. </p><p>It was now 6:40 am, and Remus was all cried out. He was supposed to start getting ready for school soon, but was he gonna be allowed to go to school? When would his punishment be over? Would Daddy make him stay here another night? He suddenly heard movement, and despite being sure it wasn’t Daddy, he still quickly stood up and put himself back in the corner, though he kept sucking on his thumb. He heard footsteps coming into the living room, and he knew it had to be Roman. Normally he would get embarrassed if Roman saw him in the corner or in the Position, since it was a bit humiliating, but he didn’t even have the energy for that. He dared once more to look out of the corner and stare at his brother with weak eyes. </p><p>Roman had just rolled out of bed, and was in charge of waking Remus up in the morning. Which is why he had been a bit concerned when he saw that his twin wasn’t in his room. Roman had checked under the bed and in the closet, since sometimes he had found his brother in those places, cowering or sleeping. The next place to look was the living room, which is where he found Remus, standing in the corner and sucking his thumb. Roman’s first thought was that Remus had somehow managed to wake up early and already get himself in trouble, but when he met his brother’s eyes, he could tell something much more serious had happened. </p><p>Roman looked over the couch where mom and dad were sleeping. He didn’t want to wake them and risk getting in trouble himself. So he quietly held his breath and he walked over to Remus. His brother sniffled when he approached, and it made Roman feel very sad. He had seen Remus cry plenty of times, had even heard what it sounded like when he screamed. It was all heartbreaking all the same, but these quiet cries were the hardest. Because these were broken cries, these were the ones that came after all the fight had left him. Roman was very familiar with those cries. </p><p>“What happened?” Roman whispered, standing very close to Remus so he didn’t have to be any louder than necessary. Remus shrugged. </p><p>“I don’ ‘member…” He admitted, only pulling his thumb out long enough to speak before he put it back in his mouth. Roman didn’t understand the thumb sucking, and was sometimes embarrassed for his brother when he was caught doing it, but after punishments like these, Roman could hardly blame him. </p><p>“How long you been in timeout?” He asked, suddenly noticing the small bruises that were forming on his head, as well as a few that were forming on his legs. Long enough for bruises to form, though Roman had no idea how long that took. Remus’s face scrunched up a bit, as if he was trying to remember. </p><p>“Long time.” Was all he could manage, before he looked back at Daddy, making sure that he wasn’t waking up. When he looked back at Roman, his eyes were filled with tears again. </p><p>“Wanna go to sleep.” He whimpered around his thumb, before closing his eyes. Roman couldn’t help the anger that bubbled in him. Had dad left him out here all night? Roman sent a glare to the sleeping figure that he would not dare fixate on the man while he was awake. When he looked back at Remus, his brown eyes were open again.</p><p>“Daddy hates me.” He cried, and Roman couldn’t stand it anymore. He pulled Remus away from the corner and into a deep hug. Remus accepted the action and let himself be carefully rocked by his twin. Even though they were the same age, Remus always found that Roman took care of him. It made him want to cry more, but he knew he still had to be quiet. </p><p>“Dad doesn’t hate you…” Roman whispered, and truly he believed that. Their dad was mean and awful, but they deserved the punishments they got, right? Remus was naughty a lot, even though Roman was starting to think that maybe Remus couldn’t help it as much as they seemed to think he could. Still, dad loved him. He had to, right? Dads had to love their kids. </p><p>Remus didn’t respond, because he knew saying otherwise would just make Roman upset, and he didn’t want Roman to let go of him. They had had this conversation before, late late at night when neither of them could sleep and they craved each other’s company. Remus just let himself be held. </p><p>After a few minutes, Roman pulled away. Remus whimpered at the action, but understood. He started walking back towards the corner. </p><p>“No.” Roman whispered, grabbing Remus’s hand. “Mom said you could get out,” </p><p>“What?” Remus responded back quietly, not understanding, pulling the thumb out of his mouth. “Mommy didn’t-”</p><p>“She did. I heard her.” Roman said, before gesturing towards the hallway that led to the bedrooms. “And my alarm didn’t go off, so we missed the bus.” He added, and Remus finally recognized the glint in his brother's eyes. Remus smiled weakly, before nodding, finally understanding that it was a lie, one that he would get away with if Roman backed him up. </p><p>Roman led his brother back to his room, never letting go of his hand as they walked, which Remus was grateful for. When he walked in, he pretended not to notice the now ripped new jeans that his dad had bought him. He hadn’t liked them anyways, he’d told Remus that when he got them. They were tight and too short. When Remus crawled into bed, he started sucking his thumb again. Roman pulled the comforter up around his brother’s shoulders. </p><p>“Where’s Teddy?” Roman asked, looking around for Remus’s stuffed teddy bear. They had both gotten one when they were first born, and both still had them. Roman’s was in his closet, since he didn’t like sleeping with stuffed animals anymore, particularly because of the way Remus would get chastised by their dad for sleeping with his. </p><p>“Daddy took him away again.” Remus grumbled, cuddling a pillow close to his chest as a substitute. Roman nodded, before hurrying out of the room. Remus was a bit confused, wishing his brother hadn’t suddenly left. Tears pricked his eyes, but they didn’t have the chance as Roman was soon running back into the room, Teddy in his arms. </p><p>“But--” Remus started, but Roman was already tucking the bear in with his brother. </p><p>“We’ll put him back before Dad even notices, I promise.” Roman said, though he’d accidentally broken promises like that before. Their dad was too unpredictable, a promise centered around him not finding something out was bound to be a broken one, because their dad seemed to find everything out. But still, Remus was inclined to trust his brother more than fearing their dad. He pulled the bear close to him and closed his eyes. </p><p>“Nigh’, Bubby.” Remus said around his thumb. Normally Roman hated the nickname, and would tell Remus off for calling him that, but today he didn’t mind it, just this once. He gently patted Remus’s arm. </p><p>“Night, Bubba.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Logan's invited Remus over after an incident on Campus, asking him to stay the weekend. Logan assures the other that if he feels the need to regress, he wouldn't have issue with it. Remus isn't so sure about the offer though. </p><p>+++</p><p>Warnings: Swearing, Remus says some dirty things, Remus thinks some negative things about his own regression so please take care when reading, vague illusions of self harm. Let me know if other warnings are needed!</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>oops sorry it's been over a month but here's the next chapter! I didn't forget about this story, it's just things have been kind of hard in my life and I avoid writing angst when I am sad (Unless it's a vent piece). </p><p>I feel like my writing style changes like 12 times in this chapter alone, and probably it changed completely from the last chapter lol. I will say there is no regression in this chapter, but it does set up how Logan and Remus first start their relationship for this au, so I thought it was important to include.</p><p>next chapter will be angsty, so who knows when that one will come out, but hopefully much quicker than a month &lt;3</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Present Day </p><p>Remus wondered if he cracked his knuckles again, maybe it would help ease the tension he was feeling about the whole situation. </p><p>-Crack-</p><p>“Huh, guess not.”</p><p>Remus was sitting in the kitchen that belonged to Logan Sanders, and it was quite obvious to himself that it was somewhere where he did not belong. The whole apartment screamed ‘I am mentally stable and can vacuum at least once a week’, but especially the kitchen just felt so homely. The fake marble counters had things for cooking sitting on them that Remus could only guess their applications. The cabinets were stocked full, almost too much so for a man who lived by himself, and occasionally his boyfriend. (Well, Remus assumed it was too much. He could count on his fingers how many things he had in his own apartment cabinets, and that was plenty enough for him.) There were pictures hanging on walls of Logan with his family (He is the eldest of five, something which Remus could not envy), decor that enhanced the setting beyond ‘This is a place where one lives’ to ‘This is a home’, and a lovely smell of gingerbread that was coming from somewhere beyond Remus’s sight. Remus could really only identify with three things in the room. The bottle of whiskey that was perched on the fridge, the water stains in the sink that probably just needed a bit of elbow grease to get rid of, and the eyesore that was his own backpack, sitting on the counter. </p><p>Logan had invited him over for the weekend after his break down on campus, probably out of concern that Remus shouldn’t be left alone. The offer hadn’t exactly come out of nowhere, of course. Remus had spent the night at his friend’s plenty of times before, typically when he needed a ride to work the next day. But those had been different. Those nights they usually kept to themselves, Remus barely allowing himself to take up any space in the man’s apartment that wasn’t the couch he was crashing on and the distance between said couch and the front door. Those nights Remus and Logan were more than content to leave each other to their own devices. For Logan that meant grading papers or making assignments for his teaching assistant job. For Remus that usually meant playing games on his phone or texting Janus, when he could text him, anyways. Now Janus’s phone had been taken away and Remus didn’t have much left to keep him going, which apparently meant breaking down and regressing in a bathroom on campus and being found by Logan. </p><p>When all had been said and done and Logan had asked for an explanation, Remus was surprised with how willing he was to talk about his regression with the other. It was something he had kept hidden for years, the only one knowing about it being Janus, and literally only because he did it too. They had had to learn about it together, realizing it was something that a lot of people with ‘baggage’ did. He found himself agonizing about it for hours on Logan’s couch, telling him how much he both loathed and loved it, hating the way it made him so vulnerable, but loving how it could also make him feel safe and comforted. He hadn’t gone into detail about why he regressed, that wasn’t something he was ready to share with the man he’d only known a year, but it was pretty obvious by the end of their conversation that Remus was a special flavor of fucked up that Logan hadn’t previously known. By the end of their talk, Logan had promised to do more research on it, and offered his services however he could. </p><p>A couple of days of research later, and a pretty lengthy text message about ‘Wanting to make sure you are safe and taking care of yourself’, (And he could just gag at how well Logan seemed to know him), Remus found himself here, in a too homely kitchen, waiting for Logan to get off the phone so they could finally talk about what the plan was. Because there always had to be a plan with Logan. Remus was much more endeared to the ‘Wing it and see what happens’ philosophy, though he couldn’t help but feel a bit grateful that that wasn’t going to be the case, at least this time. </p><p>When Logan finally reentered the kitchen, Remus sighed dramatically, hoping to get across his frustration with the other. “That took forever, was that your boss-guy?” He asked. Logan took the seat next to Remus. </p><p>“That was Dr. Fitz, yes. I was calling to let him know that I wouldn’t be available this weekend, so hopefully one of the other TA’s can finish grading the exams.” He explained in his matter-of-fact tone that Remus usually loved to listen to. Logan was so easy to listen to, if one took the time. He could go on rants and raves about whatever he was currently studying, and Remus was always ready to sit down and tune in. However, Remus couldn’t help but feel a bit ashamed in himself that Logan had gone out of his way to schedule time off just for him, and found that his normally smooth toon was now just bordering on frustrating. He didn’t want to be a burden, he hadn’t even wanted to come. </p><p>“Didn’t need to do all that. I’ll probably just be on my phone the whole time anyways, unless work calls me in.” He said with a shrug.  Remus liked getting attention from Logan, he really did. Logan never seemed to be bothered by his presence, which was a huge step up from what he was used to. But Logan also listened to him, let him ramble about whatever cool new thing he found on Wikipedia or something dumb that happened at work. The guy even actively sought out his friendship and company when Remus had stopped coming to his class, just because he had enjoyed their hours of conversation they would have in the classroom, only being broken up when a new class would come in or Logan had his own to get to. Remus wouldn’t be unwilling to say he was good friends with Logan, and he craved that friendship. Which is why he absolutely could not fuck everything up by doing something weird or making Logan feel like he had to take care of him. </p><p>“It is more for my own benefit than yours, I assure you. I have an exam on Wednesday that I have to prepare for.” Logan said, and Remus was sure that his excuse wasn’t the full truth. He probably did have an exam on Wednesday, but Remus suspected that this weekend Logan’s would be watching him like a hawk just to make sure he didn’t break down or do something stupid, as he was prone to do. It somehow made Remus feel both incredibly insecure and insanely cared for. What a combination of emotions to have. </p><p>"Sure, whatever you say Nerd-Turd." Remus teased, but the enthusiasm wasn't felt. He was sure the conversation wasn't over, what with the way Logan was looking at him with sympathy dripping eyes that were far too caring for Remus. He physically squirmed under the stare. The silence between them was long and uncomfortable, and Remus was sure there was a dick joke somewhere in that last thought that he just didn't care to make. </p><p>"Just say what you're thinking and quit looking at me like that." Remus snapped, just a bit testy. It was all in the name of preservation, of course. He didn't actually want to piss Logan off or push him away, but that's what Remus was prone to do when he felt trapped. However,  Logan's thick skin always let Remus's verbal punches roll off his shoulder, and Remus really appreciated that about Logan. At least it meant it would be harder to scare him away. </p><p>Harder, though not impossible.</p><p>“You might not like what I have to say,” Logan explained, further putting off what Remus could feel was coming. This was the first time they had properly seen each other after the incident on campus and his own confessions about it. They had chatted briefly over text, but never brought it back up. Remus was sure he could predict what his friend was going to say. He assumed, with good reason, that Logan was going to ask that he refrain from regressing while he was around, to keep it as far away from him as possible. Remus wouldn’t blame him or even be disappointed. Why would anyone want to put up with a grown man who acted like a toddler? Especially if said adult man was prone to tantrums, as Remus was. If Logan hadn’t invited him over, and if Remus managed to fight off his darker urges that demand he self soothe in other ways, he probably would have spent the whole weekend regressed, thinking about how much he wanted and missed Janus. Right, Logan didn’t need that kind of stress, he was kind enough asking him over so that Remus didn’t do something stupid. Remus could do it. He had hidden his regression from everyone in his life so far (Not that he had that many people in his life to hide it from, anyways). He would be willing to keep that hidden away from Logan forever if it meant they would stay friends. </p><p>Which is why he was so shocked when none of what he was thinking was remotely close to what Logan ended up saying. </p><p>“While doing research on Age Regression, I found that many find it very discomforting and bordering on painful when fighting off ‘slipping down’.” (Logan made sure to emphasize his use of the phrase by pulling out a notecard from god knows where. Remus would have been very endeared to it, if he wasn’t so utterly embarrassed by the conversation they were having.) “Given the stress that you have been going through, I wanted to assure you that if you feel like you need to regress, it is perfectly fine if you do so. I have experience watching over younger children, if you would want me to watch you. I am also okay with you just continuing regressing on your own while you’re here. I just want you to know that it’s a safe place.” When Logan was finished with his speech, Remus looked the other up and down, trying to figure out if this was a trap or a joke, or something that wasn’t so freaking kind of his friend to do. He drummed his fingers on the table to fill the silence that fell over them as he considered Logan’s...offer? Was this an offer to be more involved in Remus’s life? And Logan was right on the money too about it hurting when fighting off regression. Well, hurt wouldn’t be the exact word Remus would use. It just felt uncomfortable, like wearing skin that was too tight or hair that’s been pulled back for too long. But he’s managed to do it plenty of times in his life. </p><p>However, he didn’t have to today if he didn’t want to. He could regress, and Logan could make sure he didn’t hurt himself when he was small. It was a tempting offer, it really was. Considering over the past year he’d been having to do it all on his own when he was so used to Janus being right there to comfort him or play with him or whatever his little self needed. Just the thought of Janus made him want to say yes, because he missed his best friend so much, and that thought was making the edges of his brain fuzzy. He shook his head to release the haze, because he was literally in the middle of a conversation, and he had zoned out for God knows how long. When he focused his attention back on Logan, he could see the other was still patiently waiting for an answer. </p><p>“I dunno, I mean, aren’t you weirded out by it at all?” Remus asked, cursing his own internal need to deny himself even the slightest bit of comfort. But it should be weird. Logan should be more put off by it, so why was his friend being so casual and so caring about something that Remus had gone his whole life thinking it was wrong? </p><p>“I’ll admit when you first explained it to me, I didn’t quite understand it. But that’s what research is for.” Logan said with a dismissive shrug, and it was such a Logan answer that it made Remus laugh. Because that’s how Logan rationalized everything. If he could read it in a scholarly book or read a peer reviewed article on a topic, then he would accept it as true. It was that simple. Remus couldn’t even convince himself that bugs didn’t have feelings, so it was something he greatly admired in the other man. Remus was losing defenses against why Logan shouldn’t be so willing to accept his coping habit. Logan should have thought it was weird, shouldn’t have wanted to take care of Remus. But that was Logan Sanders for you, always defying expectations. </p><p>“Okay.” Remus said, a bit softer than he meant for it to come out. When he sees Logan raise an eyebrow in question, he quickly clears his throat and sits up a bit straighter (when had he started slouching?). “I mean...Only if you’re okay with it really...and I probably won’t even regress, or if I do I probably won’t be a bother. I’m an angel.” That was a lie...that was a lot of lies, actually. But Remus had never been a proponent of truth anyways. If Logan senses he’s lying, he doesn’t say anything, and Remus is relieved at that. </p><p>“Again, yes. I am perfectly amenable to you regressing. Is there anything I should prepare?” He asked, shooting Remus right back into insecurity. What would he need to prepare for? He and Janus had never prepared for anything when they thought the other might regress. They had a few kiddie items that sometimes got used, like coloring books and toys, but it would probably be weird to ask for those kinds of things, if Logan even had anything at all. And he wasn’t a baby. (Usually.) He didn’t need things like sippy cups or pacifiers, and even if he did want those comforts, it was practically a certain Logan didn’t have anything like that. Remus shrugged just a bit, now unsure how to answer the question. </p><p>“Probably not. If I do regress, and again I probably won’t, then maybe just like giving me the cartoon channel and leaving out crackers or something will work.” He said, trying his best to ensure that Logan wouldn’t view him as a burden. Because if Logan grew to resent little Remus, it would hurt like hell. And Remus would do anything to avoid a pain like that again. Logan nodded along, probably taking mental notes, that nerd. Remus tried to rack his brain, wondering if there was anything else he needed to prepare Logan for. One thing came to mind, but it was rather overwhelming to admit. Still, it would only be fair that Logan knows what he’s signing up for, so in the very least he could back out now before he dove head first into it. </p><p>“I should warn you… I um...I’m prone to tantrums.” He confessed, and it felt like lead coming out of his mouth as he spoke. Tantrum probably wasn’t the right word for it, but that’s what Remus called it. Sometimes, when things became too much, he would freak out, throw toys or crayons, stomp around, yell and scream. All tantrum behaviours, but it wasn’t something he wanted to do. He didn’t choose to behave defiantly, it would just burst out of him. It had scared Janus the first few times he’d had them, but only because Janus hadn’t expected it or knew how to handle it. Honesty, Remus didn’t know how to handle it. Usually he either worked through the tantrum until he tired himself out, then he’d take a nap. </p><p>“As the eldest of five brothers, I feel confident in saying that I can handle just about anything.” Logan said, and Remus kept the comment about Logan being too cocky to himself, not wanting to make this weekend any harder by pissing Logan off. </p><p>“Is there anything else I should know? Any boundaries I should be aware of? I read that some regressors have rules and such for themselves, anything like that?” Logan asked, and Remus was beginning to suspect that Logan knew more about age regression than he did, and he was the freaking regressor! He didn’t have rules! Or boundaries! Janus just seemed to know what to do, and when Remus was bratty Janus usually just let it go. They didn’t really have much of a system or rules, they just did what they wanted and it seemed to work out fine. Sure, maybe a bit of structure for when they were little would be nice...but then that would be indulging it, and Remus wasn’t sure he wanted to do that quite yet. </p><p>“Um, I don’t think so. I guess if I’m annoying you can just set me in front of the tv and ignore me. I’ll wear myself out eventually.” Remus said with an unsure shrug that if Logan picked up on, he didn’t comment on it. He seemed to be processing everything in his computer-like brain, before nodding and offering a small smile that Remus loved to see, only because of their rarity. </p><p>“Alright, good to know.” He said. Remus nodded in agreement, and wondered if there would be more to this terrible, awkward, and downright unpredictable conversation. But suddenly Logan was standing, which startled Remus enough to rise as well, pulling his bookbag close to him, in case he was meant to follow. Logan cocked an eyebrow at the action, before deciding not to question it. </p><p>“I’m going to go study for my exam, if you need me, please don’t hesitate to find me.” Logan said, and Remus felt just a bit proud that Logan didn’t feel the need to remind him of the wifi password or show him how to work the tv, he simply trusted him. Remus nodded, before shooting a finger gun at Logan with his free hand.</p><p>“You got it Hannibal Lecture.” Remus responded, and if Logan appreciated the pun, Remus wouldn’t know, because they both quickly went their separate ways, Logan towards his room and Remus towards the couch in the living room. He sat down and made himself comfortable, setting his bag at the end near his feet. He pulled out his phone for a second, but then decided he didn’t want to look at it. It just made him think about how much he missed Janus. He sighed, before looking at the turned off television screen. This weekend was going to be hard...but maybe Logan’s offer would make it a little bit better. If he regressed, which he planned not to anyways. He closed his eyes and sighed. </p><p>Whatever happened this weekend, it was sure as hell going to be interesting.</p>
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<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>This is a flashback chapter</p><p>Remus was caught sneaking food into his adopted family's house, and his adopted mom isn't happy about it. </p><p>+++</p><p>Warnings: Time outs, swearing, trauma regression, crying, if i need to add more please let me know!</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This chapter wasn't originally planned but when I got the idea for it I really wanted to include it, if for no other reason than to provide a bit more backstory to Remus and Janus. After this chapter it will return back to the present Logan and Remus story, and that should be the last chapter I think! But it's been hard for me to write this story because it's very personal, and I've just really been going through it lately. </p><p>Anyways, I hope this chapter is okay &lt;3</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Remus Hathaway, you get your butt back down here!” The scathing women called from the stairs. Remus had almost made it all the way up. He spun around on the step, staring her down. He felt tears pricking in his eyes, but he was big, he wasn’t going to cry!</p><p>“That’s not my name! It’s King! Remus King!” He yelled at her. He hated that they had given him their last name. Hated that they had adopted him, and hated hated hated that she wouldn’t just let him go to the room that wasn’t his and just be alone (or as alone as he could be in a room he shared with two other boys). He heard footsteps behind him, and suddenly he was being shoulder checked by someone coming down the stairs. When he saw that it was Virgil, his eyes softened just a bit. </p><p>“Try and be easy on him, Mrs. Kraken, he didn’t get much sleep.” Virgil defended. The woman rolled her eyes at the blatant disrespect as Virgil finished making his way downstairs. </p><p>“Don’t get an attitude with me either, Virgil, or I’ll put you in timeout as well. I don’t care if you’re 16, my house, my rules.” She scolded, but Remus hadn’t comprehended what she said, or seen the way Virgil rolled his eyes but apologized. Because his mind was now racing with one thought. </p><p>‘Time out time out time out time out time out…’</p><p>“Now, Remus, for disrespecting me and for sneaking food from school into your room, again, you’re going to get ten minutes in time out.” Her words seemed to finally release Remus out of his frozen terror, and he shook his head, clearing his mind for a moment. Hot anger bubbled in his stomach. Who was she to put him in timeout? He was 14! Way too old for such a punishment. </p><p>“No! You’re not putting me in timeout!” He yelled. Virgil’s eyes grew wide, and from behind his adopted mom, Remus could see him mouth ‘What the fuck?’, a quiet sign to remind him to knock it off, that being defiant would make things a million times worse, but Remus didn’t care. He was not going in timeout! He could feel something else blooming in him at the thought of timeout that he couldn’t quite label, but it made him so determined not to face it he would rather fight and claw his way out of it. </p><p>He sat down on the steps when he saw Mrs. Hathaway making her way up them. He could see the fumes behind her eyes that were often reserved just for him, because he was the bad kid. He was the one who never learned his lesson, and it made her want to teach it to him over and over again until something finally stuck. Despite his placement on the stairs, she still grabbed his arm and yanked, dragging him back into a standing position and down the steps. He was about to wretch his arm free from her grasp, he was stronger and almost as tall as her, but then he caught Virgil’s eyes, and they held a deep warning in them. ‘I can’t help you if you make things worse’ those eyes seemed to say, and it made all of the bubbling anger from before fizzle out, and all Remus felt was that dreaded ache that he couldn’t identify before, but now it was unmistakable. </p><p>He was scared. </p><p>Suddenly his face was being pushed into a corner. A long whine escaped him that he couldn’t find the energy to suppress. He could feel a tightness in his chest that made him panicky. </p><p>“I-I’ll be good, Mrs. Hathaway!” He cried, turning around to face her, but she quickly grabbed his shoulders and spun him back around. He felt his whole body go tense at the touch, and how much he hated it. He sniffled, growing overwhelmed. </p><p>“Don’t be a brat about this. Maybe you’ll think next time before you try and sneak food into this house. You act like we don’t even feed you.” She explained. She stood right behind him, to make sure he didn’t turn back around or try and escape again, but Remus didn’t even have that kind of energy, feeling waves of defeat overwhelm him. He wanted to panic, he wanted to scream and cry and freak out because she was gonna leave him here and never let him out. In fact, her standing right behind him helped calm him down a bit. She couldn’t forget about him if she was looking right at him. </p><p>Still though, he felt terrified. He wanted to be back in his room with Janus or Virgil and cry. He rocked back and forth on his heels, which she thankfully didn’t seem to have a problem with. He didn’t let his tears fall, because he knew crying made things worse. He tried to peek out to see if Virgil was still there, kind of hoping he was because Virgil brought him a lot of comfort...but also kind of hoping he wasn’t because it would be embarrassing for the elder boy to see him like this. He wasn’t able to see the other though, and he decided to just resign himself to his fate. </p><p>When ten minutes was up, Mrs. Hathaway spun Remus around to face her. Her face softened just the smallest bit when she saw the state the boy was in, near tears and still rocking on his feet. But Remus didn’t take any comfort in her pity or disgust or whatever that face was meant to portray. He just wanted to go. </p><p>“I hope you’ve learned your lesson, young man.” She said, and Remus nodded, because he didn’t trust his voice enough not to betray him. His eyes flicked over to where Virgil had been, and saw the room empty. When his eyes moved back to Mrs. Hathaway, she was still staring at him. </p><p>“Here, let’s hug it out, yeah?” She said, holding out her arms, and Remus wished he could say no. Because he didn’t want a hug from her right now, he was angry with her. He wanted to go to his room! But he knew better than to say no. So he nodded and stepped forward into her embrace, though he refused to return it. She squeezed him tightly, and part of him wished he could be okay being hugged by her, he longed for a hug from his real mom…</p><p>He really needed to get to his room now, or he might start crying in front of her, which would only lead to questions and more hugs that he didn’t want. When she finally pulled away, he quietly made his way back towards the stairs. He was sure that Mrs. Hathaway had wanted him to probably say something, to thank her or apologize or anything, but he was pretty sure he wouldn’t be able to speak past the lump in his throat. When he was up the stairs, he spotted Virgil once more, who was leaning on the wall next to their bedroom.</p><p>“That was real stupid of you, leaving food in your backpack. Thought you would have learned by now.” Virgil said, and that did it. Remus couldn’t fight his tears anymore. They began to fall fast, and they seemed to shock Virgil enough to stand up straighter, worried eyes looking him over. </p><p>“You okay?” Virgil asked, and it was a dumb question for sure. Of course he wasn’t okay! Remus tried to wipe the tears, hating them and wishing he could feel bigger. Virgil stared at him, and it made Remus feel even smaller. </p><p>“Janus in there?” Remus managed to force out, and Virgil seemed relieved that he wouldn’t have to be the one to try and remedy this. He gave a short nod. </p><p>“Yeah, I think he was doing homework or something when I came down.” Virgil said, before opening the bedroom door. From where Remus was, he could see Janus sitting on his bed, writing away on something. When the other noticed the door opened, he looked up, his eye landing on the tearful Remus, and recognition of what was happening fell on him. </p><p>Remus didn’t wait to see if Virgil would say anything more. It was like a switch went off in the boy’s brain the moment his eyes fell on Janus. The tears he was trying to hide from Virgil no longer felt like betrayals of anguish, but relief. Janus was safety, and Remus needed that comfort more than anything. The boy ran past Virgil and into their room, ignoring the concerned look the elder flashed him. </p><p>“Remus?” Janus said, worry lacing his tone when his friend came barreling into the room, fisting his hair with one hand. “What happened?” He asked either of them as he set his work to the side. He swung his legs over the side of the bed and opened his arms, allowing Remus to fall into his embrace. It was awkward, Remus had had a growth spurt and was now a lot taller than his friend, but Janus still held him as close as he could. When it was clear Remus wasn’t going to respond, Janus turned his attention to Virgil who was still standing in the doorway. </p><p>“Hathaway put him in timeout, and he started freaking.” Virgil explained, stepping into the room and shutting the door so none of the other kids, or God forbid Mr. Hathaway, could hear their conversation. “Is he...ya know...doing that thing you guys do?” Virgil asked, noticing how the thirteen year old gently patted Remus’s back. Janus shrugged, before turning his attention back to Remus. </p><p>“You okay, Rem?” Janus asked, pulling back a bit so he could get a good look at Remus’s face. The boy whined slightly at the loss of the hug, quickly shaking his head no. </p><p>“I dun wanna be in timeout!” He cried, tugging on his hair. Janus tried to move his hand away, but Remus jerked it back as if he had thought that Janus was moving to strike him. The boy felt immediately guilty about that, and took note that his movements would have to be very soft for now. </p><p>“It’s okay Rem, you aren’t in timeout anymore. You’re here with me and Vee.” Janus said in a gentle tone, trying to channel as much comfort as he could for his friend. He knew that sometimes Remus would forget where he was or think he was back at home with his family. Janus still didn’t know how to ground him well during those times, but he would always start by trying to explain where Remus actually was. Sometimes it helped, sometimes it didn’t. </p><p>This time, it did seem to help. The boy blinked, before stepping back into Janus’s still outheld arms. He went right back to gently patting his back.</p><p>“Wanna tell me what happened?” Janus asked, and wasn’t surprised when Remus shook his head no. He never really wanted to talk about the thoughts that plagued his mind when he was...Well they didn’t really have a word for it. But sometimes when the world was too much or something happened and they ‘snapped’, they would crave the comforts of being a child...It was weird, and they didn’t know why they did it, but they were determined to be there for each other when it happened. Virgil knew about it as well, though he said it didn’t happen to him so he didn’t really get it. </p><p>“Wha’ time is?” Remus asked, fisting one of his eyes. “Wanna go to sleep.” He mumbled. Janus looked towards Virgil to provide an answer, since he was the only one with a phone. Virgil nodded and pulled it out. </p><p>“It’s about a quarter til five, you can probably take a small nap before dinner, kid.” Virgil said. Janus nodded and scooted further back in the bed. </p><p>“You can stay with me if you want,” He offered, and watched with no surprise when Remus nodded his head, before laying down in Janus’s bed. </p><p>“I promise I’ll wake you up for dinner.” Janus whispered, before picking his notebook back up. Remus nodded, before closing his eyes and sticking his thumb in his mouth. Janus didn’t bother to tell him to take it out, since he knew how comforting it was, and he didn’t think Mrs. or Mr. Hathaway would come check on them. Janus knew first hand what they did when they got him sucking his thumb, so if he didn’t think it was safe to do so, he wouldn’t risk it. </p><p>Virgil didn’t say anything, he never said anything about it. He couldn’t imagine being so young and going through the shit they had gone through, and he’d gone through his own personal hell as well. He sighed, before opening the door. </p><p>“Night ya weirdos.” He said lovingly, and Janus smiled back despite the insult, watching as Virgil left, shutting the door behind him. Janus sighed with relief, before looking down at Remus. </p><p>“Night, Rem.” He said, gently petting his hair, before returning to his homework.</p>
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<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Remus wasn’t sure how long he had zoned out for, but when he blinked himself back to consciousness, three things became clear to him all at once </p><p>1. It’s nighttime <br/>2. Logan forgot to give him a blanket<br/>3. He is not big </p><p>+++</p><p>Warnings: Crying, controlling foster parents, swearing, let me know if more are needed &lt;3</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i am honestly really tempted to end the story here because I really like how this story ends, but I haven't even gotten to the scene that inspired me to write this. I just don't wanna hurt the baby anymore than i already do ;-; </p><p>As of right now, I am still planning to write another chapter though, and finally get to the climax of this story, but I may change my mind in the future because this story is just very hard to write sometimes because of how close to my heart it is &lt;3</p><p>anyways, if you liked this chapter, please let me know! comments and kudos are always appreciated!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Remus wasn’t sure how long he had zoned out for, but when he blinked himself back to consciousness, three things became clear to him all at once </p><p>1. It’s nighttime <br/>2. Logan forgot to give him a blanket<br/>3. He is not big </p><p>He sat up on the couch and rubbed his eyes, which felt sore from staring at nothing for so long. He tried to recall anything he’d been thinking about for...the past hour? He tried looking at the clock to make sense of how long he’d been zoned out, but the numbers all melded together, and even if he could understand them, he couldn’t remember what time he’d laid down. </p><p>He wasn’t cold, but he wished that he had something to protect him from the world. All at once he felt  overwhelmed by how long he’d zoned out, by how scary it was to wake up in a place you aren’t familiar with (Because while Big Remus has spent plenty of time here, little Remus hadn’t), and by the fact that he had regressed despite having tried so hard not to! He felt tears burning the backs of his eyes, but he refused to let them fall, he needed to be a big boy about this!</p><p>He sniffled quietly and shuffled towards his bookbag. He opened it up and started digging through it, pulling out his change of clothes, his charger, his phone, and then finally at the bottom of the bag, he found what he was looking for. He could have started crying out of relief. </p><p>He pulled out his mini octopus plush that he always carried with him. He knew it was silly to carry toys in your bookbag...but it made him feel better. It meant that he always had a little friend with him even when bad things were happening. He cuddled the toy close to his chest and flopped back down on the couch, petting the soft texture as he elf soothed. </p><p>Suddenly, his phone lit up, catching Remus’s attention. He leaned down and picked it up from the mess he’d made in Logan’s living room. The light was much too bright for the dark room, so it took him a few seconds of blinking and squinting before he could finally focus on the words. He tried to make sense of them, but just like the numbers on the clock, the letters all swam together into useless squiggles. He did, however, recognize the picture of who was texting him.</p><p>Remus gasped, Janus wasn’t supposed to be texting him! He knew that the other could get in a lot of trouble if Mrs. Hathaway found out. He tried to calm himself down so that he could read the texts, because he wanted to know what his friend was saying, he wanted to know Janus was okay. He stood up and took another look around. Logan would probably be really upset that he made a mess of his living room...But Logan was his friend! He could help! So, without much of a second thought, and despite the protests in the back of his mind, Remus ventured off towards Logan’s room. </p><p>He wasn’t sure how late it was, so he hoped that he wouldn’t be waking his friend up to help. He was relieved to see that there was light still pooling out from under Logan’s door. Remus took a deep breath, still quite apprehensive about being regressed around Logan. What if he thought he was annoying? Still, he reminded himself once more that Logan was his friend, and he’s the one who offered to help out if Remus regressed. So, with no more excuses, Remus raised his fist and knocked on the door. </p><p>He could hear Logan moving around in his room. Remus held tightly to his mini octopus and his phone, anxiety building at the thought of Logan seeing him. Maybe he should pretend to be big? Maybe if he ran now Logan would just ignore him. Maybe--</p><p>“Remus?” </p><p>Remus blinked, and Logan was standing in front of him, dressed in pajamas. Remus felt a lump forming in his throat that threatened to steal his voice away, so if he was going to ask for help, he needed to do it quickly. </p><p>“Janus texted me.” He whispered, holding out his phone. Logan furrowed his eyebrows, trying to piece together why Remus was telling him this. </p><p>“That’s good, isn’t it?” Logan asked. Remus nodded. </p><p>“But I can’t read it.” He explained, and still Logan didn’t seem to get it, blinking owlishly at him, and making Remus feel all the more uncertain about asking Logan for help. </p><p>“Is there something wrong with your phone?” Logan asked, and Remus shook his head no. Logan frowned, before noticing the small little stuffed toy in Remus hand... and the pieces began to come together. </p><p>“Ah, are you regressed?” He inquired, and was rewarded with a small head nod from Remus, who even seemed different, now that Logan was looking at him with a new context. Remus usually walked with a confidence only found in those who knew exactly where they were headed. Now he seemed shy and timid. It was something he wasn’t familiar seeing on his friend, so he decided to try and tread carefully. </p><p>“Can I see your phone?” Logan asked, and was unsurprised when Remus handed it over easily. Logan opened the messages, though avoided reading them himself, not wanting to pry. </p><p>“I can set it up so that the phone will read you the message.” Logan explained as he tapped away on the phone, searching for the setting. “Then, when you want to respond back, you can push the microphone button and you can speak aloud what you want to send.” When he looked back up at Remus, he was smiling widely and shaking his free hand, while the one holding his toy squeezed it tightly. Logan couldn’t help the small smile that tugged on his own face, simply knowing he had been able to help the other. </p><p>“Thanks Lo.” Remus said when the phone was handed back to him. He grinned down at his phone, then looked back up at Logan. </p><p>“Not a problem, Remus. Do you need anything else?” He asked. He wondered if he ought to stay up with the clearly regressed boy. Perhaps he would want the company , or someone to remind him not to text too late into the night. But Remus shook his head no. </p><p>“Nuh uh, I’m good. Night Lo!” Remus said, already heading back into the living room, his face concentrated on the phone. Logan watched him go with a small chuckle. Perhaps Remus would be more self sufficient than he thought, though if he was so young that he couldn’t even read, that made Logan a little anxious. He decided he would sleep with the door open that night, so Remus wouldn’t have to go through the trouble of deciding whether or not to knock on the door if he needed him, and so Logan could hear a distress call from the living room if he was needed. </p><p>When Remus returned to the living room, he couldn’t help the giddiness he felt. It had been so long since he had been small and got to talk to Janus. He missed his friend so much, it almost made him sad. But he was way too elated to consider that! </p><p>He used the text to speech option that Logan had shown him, and had it read aloud Janus’s first message. </p><p>‘Snuck my phone from Hathwitch, so if you aren’t asleep text me back.’ </p><p>Remus had to put his phone down before responding, trying to get all of the shakes out of him. He needed to calm down so he could spend as much time as possible talking to Janus! He missed his friend so much! When he finally managed to get himself calm, he turned his phone back on and pressed the microphone button. </p><p>“Hi Jan! I miss you so so so much!” He said, then hit send. He waited impatiently, sitting down on the couch and bouncing his legs while he cuddled his toy close, his heart racing. It meant so much to him that Janus would sneak his phone just to talk to him. </p><p>His phone lit up, and Remus turned on the text to speech again. </p><p>‘Miss you too, shit sucks here. Have you been okay?’ He asked. Remus had to think over his answer carefully. He sort of wished he was bigger, because then he’d be able to answer better. But then again, he was kind of glad he was little too, because his little side never got to say goodbye, or reach out when all he wanted was Janus. </p><p>“I’m okay, I’m at Logan’s right now.” Before sending that message, Remus considered if he wanted to tell Janus that he was currently regressed. He did, he really did, but he also didn’t want to put Janus on the spot. What if he wanted to talk to big Remus? What if he didn’t want to hear how small and scared he’d been feeling recently. What if he thought being small was stupid now? It wasn’t like they’d gotten to talk about it much. But his little side just missed Janus far too much to deny himself at least the chance to talk for a little bit. So he pressed the microphone button again and added. “I’m little right now.” Before he hit send. </p><p>He anxiously waited to see Janus’s response, hoping he hadn’t ruined everything. But then, his phone lit up, but this time, Janus was calling him. </p><p>Shocked, Remus quickly answers the phone and held it up to his ear, apprehension filling him. </p><p>“Rem?” Janus whispered. The moment he hears his friend in what must have been months, Remus teared up, suppressing the sobs. He had missed Janus so much. </p><p>“Jay.” He whimpered, and it was almost like being with him, curled up in the twin size bed, hugging each other until one of them fell asleep. </p><p>“Are you safe?” Janus asked, and it takes Remus a second to realize what he means by the question. But then he quickly nodded. </p><p>“Uh huh, Logan’s a good friend.” He whispered, knowing he would have to keep his voice low just like Janus, since they couldn’t risk being heard by one of the other kids or, god forbid, the Hathaway’s themselves. </p><p>“Good...I’ve missed you a whole lot, Rem.” Janus said, and this managed to get the waterworks that Remus had been fighting to begin to flow. </p><p>“I miss you too.”</p><p>The two talked through the night, sharing stories about what they had been up to, how they had been coping, and all the plans they had for when Janus was finally finished with school so he could move out. How they would live together, and take care of each other, and nothing in the world would ever separate them again. And when the sun began to rise, and Remus knew Janus would have to go, he didn’t bother crying like he might have any other time, because he knew that no matter what, they were going to be together again. </p><p>And just as he was hanging up the phone, Logan came out from his room. He quirked an eyebrow at his friend who was staring at his phone, a small smile on his face. </p><p>“I take it your conversation with Janus went well?” Logan ask, suspecting the other had even gone back to sleep. Remus looked up at his friend, a small smile on his face. </p><p>“Yeah.”</p>
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